heartache

so there are two kind of heartaches. one is in a good way, when you feel loved and cared for. simply protected and secure. while the other is just the exact opposite. you feel insecure and totally not cared for. like you're the only one. well, i don't know which to feel right now.
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i feel like i am the root of the problem. like it's a hard time for you and your family yet i came along. after hearing all that. i don't know what to feel anymore. i honestly felt like we should just call it off. it just started. at least it won't hurt that much. the bond ain't strong it won't be hard to bear. with all these negative thoughts running through my head, i don't know what to feel. i just blanked. i don't want to be a burden. maybe i should just leave silently. maybe i just need to chill before i do something stupid again. which is what i feel like doing now. better keep all the stuff first.
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the society is the one saying things like don't judge people at the same time the one that judge. not to criticize people yet criticize them. the one who says don't get rape instead or don't rape. the one that says you've got to tell the adults when you're bullied when nothing happens even if you do. the ones that punish us from committing suicide yet let us suffer on earth. the irony never ends. that's society.
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if only i could tell you how i feel.
nights all.